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April 30, 2007 | by  | in Uncategorized |
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There’s No Such Thing As Too Much Sex

There’s no such thing as too much sex. Many would already agree with me – sex seems to be the answer for every problem that one may come across. From the awkward third year commerce student who just needs to get laid, to the emo in tight black jeans who needs to experience what life would be like with a little less depression and a little more sexual satisfaction – it has been proved that sex is the best form of TLC. Ladies – not only does it feel incredible but it tones your body, makes your hair shinier and cleanses the skin. Need I say more. Guys – it feels great and it sure beats self-served sex in front of the latest Farmers lingerie catalogue.

Sex turns curious girls into women and horny boys into… well, hornier older boys. Women our age love to read magazines like Cosmopolitan, that show new exciting positions which target new areas to tone the body, and new ways to impress in the bedroom with the latest lingerie: while the guys are still staring blankly, drooling at the topless chick on page six in the latest FHM. No notice is taken of the new lingerie; they are just amazed to have a naked girl in their room.

Sex gives people all over the world the confidence to change their lives. There are the lucky ones who get to have sex whenever they want, as much as they want. And the ones who drunkenly stumble across one another in Shooters and wake up the next morning with a hangover and a stranger hanging over them in a tiny Unicom bed. Sex gives us the skills we need for life, in all aspects of it.

Spot the virgin. Looking around the lecture theatre, they’re so easy to spot. The awkward guy who sits as far away from anyone female to avoid nervous confrontation. The shy, hesitant girl. All they need is a good shag and they would go from nervous virgin to confident swinger. Sex can do wonders for even the biggest geeks. Take Austin Powers, for example.

And Stacy Ferguson, who went from unknown all-girl pop group to Fergie, hot hip-hop artist. Even Bill Clinton – cheated on his wife, got a blowjob, then went on to write a best-selling autobiography.

So far, sex has given us a great work out, beauty sessions and plenty of endorphins. It’s given guys the chance to close the Farmers catalogue and find out what it’s like to stop dining alone. And, let’s not forget, the confidence to conquer the world.

Let’s face it – no matter how different sex is for the ladies and gentlemen – at the end of the day, you’re left with a huge grin, great sexed-up hair, and an even greater story to tell your mate, as a way to pass the time in your next marketing lecture.

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