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July 30, 2007 | by  | in Books |
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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS

Harry lives, Voldemort dies, lots of pash. If only J.K. Rowling had been so concise in writing the book. Instead 1/6 of it was taken up with month after month of camping in every forest in England, Ron being a little bitch, Hermione crying and cooking shit meals, and Harry contemplating his impending death – which never actually happened.

Determined to resist reading Harry so as to get my Media Studies homework done, I picked up my copy around 3pm on Saturday – missing the queues and the loser kids whose photographs in their outfits will return to haunt them in ten years’ time. However, Harry’s a hard guy to resist, so I wasted my weekend finding out what happened so I could get on with my life.

The incredibly drawn-out 600 page book involved the Dursley’s moving into protection, a huge war at Hogwarts, breaking into Gringotts, destroying all the Horcruxes, a special wand, the Deathly Hallows, good people turned evil and lots of camping in the forest.

As for the ‘Nineteen Years Later’ section – way to be crap, J.K. We all knew there wouldn’t be any more books, but you had to make it worse with all these kids. Why on earth would Harry give his kid the middle name ‘Severus’? Sirius, Lupin, Mad-Eye and Fred died too, and Harry actually liked them.

At the end of the day, I’m glad it’s over. I’m glad Harry’s alive and that good prevailed over evil.

I knew Snape was good all along. The book even made me cry, in the part where Lily, James, Sirius and Remus reappear to hang out with Harry for a little while. So sad.

So in the end, Harry and Ginny get together and have some kids, and so do Ron and Hermione, and they’re probably all quite unfortunate-looking, but we’ll just have to wait for the movie to find out.

J.K. ROWLING

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With her take-no-prisoners, kick-ass attitude, former News Editor Laura McQuillan adequately makes up for her lack of stature. Roaming the corridors (and underground tunnels) of the University by day, and hunting vampires and Nazi war criminals by night, McQuillan will stop at nothing to bring you the freshest news.

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