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August 6, 2007 | by  | in News |
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No leads in M&M machine attack

An official from Mars Inc, the company which manufacture M&Ms, has made a statement to Salient, following two separate incidents involving M&M machines in the Student Union Building.

Salient last week reported that an M&M machine was viciously attacked and held hostage in the building between July 20 and 21. Six weeks earlier, another machine was kidnapped from the building. The attackers are yet to be caught.

Mars Inc. Vending Customer Careline Administrator Louise Kelly says the attacks are unusual, as “it has been our experience that most of our consumers have a love for our chocolate rather than the machine that dispenses them.”

“It certainly sounds as if someone from within your university community has a fetish for the vending machines. It is very disappointing to hear that the culprit did not eat the M&Ms before roping it to a pole.”

Union officials told Salient police have no leads, and that it is unlikely the M&Ms machine will return to work.

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About the Author ()

With her take-no-prisoners, kick-ass attitude, former News Editor Laura McQuillan adequately makes up for her lack of stature. Roaming the corridors (and underground tunnels) of the University by day, and hunting vampires and Nazi war criminals by night, McQuillan will stop at nothing to bring you the freshest news.

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  1. Jean-Michel says:

    This is quite clearly the greatest tragedy in VUW history.

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