Viewport width =
March 17, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

Top 5 reasons to be a nerd

1. All the chicks
2. LAN parties
3. World of Warcraft
4. Understanding Stephen Hawking
5. Correcting mistakes on the internet

Top 5 Theories

1. String
2. Evolution
3. Gravity
4. Quantum Electrodynamics
5. Joel Cosgrove is a capitalist

Top 5 scientific discoveries

1. The earth is flat
2. The female orgasm
3. E = mc2
4. The Moon: not actually made of cheese
5. Joel Cosgrove is a capitalist

Top 5 Aliens

1. Thetans
2. ET (insert Jew joke)
3. Klingons
4. Chewbacca
5. Pope Benedict XVI

Top 5 answers to ‘Hey guys, what’s funny?’

1. Racism
2. Silence
3. Silence
4. Silence
5. Nervous shuffle

Top 5 reasons you should come write top 5s for us

1. We blatantly suck
2. We’ve been drinking meths
3. I fucking can’t take this shit any more. I quit.
4. Silence
5. We can only think of Joel Cosgrove jokes

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

Comments are closed.

Recent posts

  1. An (im)possible dream: Living Wage for Vic Books
  2. Salient and VUW tussle over Official Information Act requests
  3. One Ocean
  4. Orphanage voluntourism a harmful exercise
  5. Interview with Grayson Gilmour
  6. Political Round Up
  7. A Town Like Alice — Nevil Shute
  8. Presidential Address
  9. Do You Ever Feel Like a Plastic Bag?
  10. Sport

Editor's Pick

In Which a Boy Leaves

: - SPONSORED - I’ve always been a fairly lucky kid. I essentially lucked out at birth, being born white, male, heterosexual, to a well off family. My life was never going to be particularly hard. And so my tale begins, with another stroke of sheer luck. After my girlfriend sugge