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May 12, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
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What the fuck is with concrete?

Concrete. It’s this big, man-made grey stone right? It’s normally rectangular, which is weird, but that’s because it’s liquid when they make it.

Which… doesn’t seem quite right. Stone should not be liquid. Unless some volcano just shit it out, but that’s kind of different. Because then it’s all glowing and you can’t touch it and stuff. But more to the point, stone shouldn’t go from being liquid, to being, you know, stone. It doesn’t make sense. It’s not like it froze and turned solid, it just… did? Something about water leaching out the bottom: dude, whatever.

But those aren’t the parts of concrete that concern me. What’s really weird, is that this magical stone we call concrete (and build buildings out of – don’t get me started) is made from gravel, water, and some fucked up grey sand apparently called ‘cement’.

Did you guys make sandcastles when you were little? Remember how they were made from sand, and they needed water, and often the sand had pebbles that you just chose to ignore? And that it was fun? And that it still reminds you of a happier time, when kids were kids and parents watched proudly as their children learnt about the world, and the world was a simpler place, and the sandcastles DIDN’T turn into fucking stone!?!@ Yeah. Same.

Moral of the story: Just because there is this magic sand called cement doesn’t mean that we should be able to make our own specially shaped, apparently consistently dense stones. The end.

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