Viewport width =
July 28, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

Top five things predictive text thinks are words (Nokia 2118):

By Ralph
1. Elbog
2. Gigabounk
3. Spillador
4. Sprodbucks
5. Upwank

Top five reasons to write top fives:
by THEATRON
1. It’s shorter than a letter
2. I can’t be fucked doing anything else
3. Saves you from stabbing someone in the face
4. You’ll be famous
5. Fuck knows

Top five reasons to stab someone in the face:
by THEATRON
1. It’ll stop overpopulation
2. It’ll stop them from starving
3. They might be emo
4. You’ll be famous
5. Test out your sweet new blade

Top 5 reasons not to go to class
by Dominique
1. Being bored to death
2. Paul Tompkinson: see above
3. John Singleton: see .1
4. Sleep
5. Law readings

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

Comments are closed.

Recent posts

  1. SWAT
  2. Ravished by the Living Embodiment of All Our University Woes
  3. New Zealand’s First Rainbow Crossing is Here (and Queer)
  4. Chloe Has a Yarn About Mental Health
  5. “Stick with Vic” Makes “Insulting” and “Upsetting” Comments
  6. Presidential Address
  7. Final Review
  8. Tears Fall, and Sea Levels Rise
  9. It’s Fall in my Heart
  10. Queer Coverage: Local, National, and International LGBTQIA+ News
Website-Cover-Photo7

Editor's Pick

This Ain’t a Scene it’s a Goddamned Arm Wrestle

: Interior – Industrial Soviet Beerhall – Night It was late November and cold as hell when I stumbled into the Zhiguli Beer Hall. I was in Moscow, about to take the trans-Mongolian rail line to Beijing, and after finding someone in my hostel who could speak English, had decided