Viewport width =
July 28, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

Top five things predictive text thinks are words (Nokia 2118):

By Ralph
1. Elbog
2. Gigabounk
3. Spillador
4. Sprodbucks
5. Upwank

Top five reasons to write top fives:
by THEATRON
1. It’s shorter than a letter
2. I can’t be fucked doing anything else
3. Saves you from stabbing someone in the face
4. You’ll be famous
5. Fuck knows

Top five reasons to stab someone in the face:
by THEATRON
1. It’ll stop overpopulation
2. It’ll stop them from starving
3. They might be emo
4. You’ll be famous
5. Test out your sweet new blade

Top 5 reasons not to go to class
by Dominique
1. Being bored to death
2. Paul Tompkinson: see above
3. John Singleton: see .1
4. Sleep
5. Law readings

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

Comments are closed.

Recent posts

  1. “Representation”: Victoria Rhodes-Carlin Is Running For Greater Wellington Regional Council
  2. The Community Without A Home: Queer Homeslessness in Aotearoa
  3. Pasifika Queer in Review
  4. The National Queer in Review
  5. Māori Queer in Review
  6. LGBTQI Project Report Update
  7. International Queer in Review
  8. Rostra’s Hot Takes – Queerlient
  9. Issue 14 – Queerlient
  10. Interview with Claudia Jardine

Editor's Pick

Burnt Honey

: First tutorial of the year. When I open the door, I underestimate my strength, thinking it to be all used up in my journey here. It swings open violently and I trip into the room where awkward gazes greet me. Frozen, my legs are lead and I’m stuck on display for too long. My ov

Do you know how to read? Sign up to our Newsletter!

* indicates required