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July 28, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
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Top five things predictive text thinks are words (Nokia 2118):

By Ralph
1. Elbog
2. Gigabounk
3. Spillador
4. Sprodbucks
5. Upwank

Top five reasons to write top fives:
1. It’s shorter than a letter
2. I can’t be fucked doing anything else
3. Saves you from stabbing someone in the face
4. You’ll be famous
5. Fuck knows

Top five reasons to stab someone in the face:
1. It’ll stop overpopulation
2. It’ll stop them from starving
3. They might be emo
4. You’ll be famous
5. Test out your sweet new blade

Top 5 reasons not to go to class
by Dominique
1. Being bored to death
2. Paul Tompkinson: see above
3. John Singleton: see .1
4. Sleep
5. Law readings

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About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

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