Archive for March, 2009

Shit food discussed within earshot of shit food

Shit food discussed within earshot of shit food

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

A quiet Student Representative Council (SRC) meeting was held last Wednesday at Mount Street bar to discuss the quality of food offered on campus. Presided over by an abridged version of the Victoria University of Wellington Students’ Association Executive and little more, the meeting was unable to meet the 50-person quorum needed to pass any [...]

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Toy Stories

Toy Stories

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

There’s a complexity to Buzz Lightyear that lends him well to analysis: his twirly fringe, gloriously defined chin, gizmo-spruced spacesuit, and a helmet that does that “whoooosh” thing renders him less a piece of Star Command machinery and more “a really cool toy.” When he and Woody barely escape Psycho Sid’s firecracker during the climatic [...]

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How to Make an Epic Blockbuster Movie

How to Make an Epic Blockbuster Movie

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

In my column about how to be the best universe in the child actor author, I mentioned my novel about the android lesbian Nazi redeemer two-handed sword of ages that slept in the darkness for a thousand millennia, and got to make out with Britney Spears back when she was hot—like when she was slutty [...]

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Success in the Great Tolley Hunt

Success in the Great Tolley Hunt

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

The Great Tolley Hunt has finally achieved some success thanks to Jackson Wood, editor of Salient. Salient managed to do what all of us in student media had thought impossible, and get Tertiary Education Minister Anne Tolley to respond—sorta—to some questions. Tolley told Salient that she “hadn’t had any involvement in student politics,” a concerning [...]

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Government Pleases Stephen Fry

Government Pleases Stephen Fry

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

A nationwide protest has lead to Section 92A being amended. The controversial amendment was due to come into force on March 27, but Cabinet has decided that the law needs to be changed to address areas of concern. Commerce Minister Simon Power announced the amendment, saying that “Allowing section 92A to come into force in [...]

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The Basics of Counting and other Tricky Maths

The Basics of Counting and other Tricky Maths

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

Do you know someone who thinks university is a huge waste of time and money? Maybe a grandfather or uncle, who left school to work when he was 14, and was supporting a wife and a couple of kids when he was your age, you bloody lazy smart-arse. Are you sadistic enough to want to [...]

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Darfur! Hah! Yeah!

Darfur! Hah! Yeah!

by / 30/03/09 / No Comments

In a continuation of a policy of paranoia, Sudanese President Omar Hassan Bashir has reportedly expelled all aid workers from the troubled Dafur region. The decision was believed to have been made out of fear that the contingents of support workers in the region were assisting officials in The Hague, who had recently issued a [...]

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WRO

WRO

by / 30/03/09 / [ 8 Comments ]

Hi everyone! I’m Kassie Hartendorp and I’m the newly elected Women’s Rights Officer this year. Thanks to all of you who voted for me! As to those who thought they’d tick the old No Confidence box—I DO have your names and I.P. addresses. My wrath will be coming at you in the form of spam [...]

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There’s a Beer for Everyone

There’s a Beer for Everyone

by / 30/03/09 / [ 3 Comments ]

I’m telling you that you like beer. Even if you think you don’t, you’re wrong. You do. You just haven’t tasted the right beer for you. Too many times I hear people say “I don’t like beer,” only to discover that the only beers they’ve tried are Tui, Export, Heineken and the like. I don’t [...]

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President’s Column

President’s Column

by / 30/03/09 / [ 4 Comments ]

An important part of tertiary education is learning how to question, analyse and challenge the world in which we live. Student media have always had an important role to play in this process. The best example of this at Victoria University has been student print media, in particular, Salient. Founded in 1938, Salient has been [...]

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