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May 16, 2011 | by  | in Film |
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Fast Five

The latest instalment from the franchise that doesn’t understand the meaning of a chequered flag, Fast Five has no business being any good. The original was fantastic speed-orientated action with over the top racing scenes, action stars and one liners, but a series of progressively worse sequels don’t exactly create much anticipation for this latest offering.

Very surprisingly, Fast Five, is quite enjoyable. Dom Toretto (Diesel) is sentenced to 25 to life, so, of course, Brian O’Connor (Paul Walker) and girlfriend Mia Toretto set out to break him out. One could be forgiven for thinking they are trying to kill him, as their attempt to bust him out sees his prison bus tumbling end over end in a never-ending death roll.

Inexplicably, he’s not only alive but totally unharmed. This is a running theme of the movie, our heroes have no common sense whatsoever, and things that would kill a regular person three times over leave not a scratch on their impossibly chiselled bodies.

The fugitives then for some reason think it’s a sensible idea decide to rob the biggest crime lord in Rio for $100 million. They put an Oceans 11-esque team of clearly suicidal people together. All of whom are willing to drop whatever they are doing to fly to Rio. This “plot” is just an excuse for well choreographed action scenes, of which Fast Five has in abundance.

The movie continues on the heist theme, with The Rock and Diesel periodically competing to see whose head is the baldest and who wears the tightest T-shirts. The story gets progressively more ludicrous, Brazilian stand offs, brawls, and gun fights do nothing to deter “Toretto’s 9″ from their mission.
None of the ridiculousness matters, because if you’re sitting down to watch this movie you’ve already checked your brain in at the popcorn counter.

Fast Five is big, stupid fun, with the emphasis on fun. There’s enough corny dialogue for a Seagal straight to VHS, but the pace of the movie is such that a car chase, fist fight or explosion (I.e. something to keep you from thinking) is never far away.

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