The Week That Wasn’t
MAN USES INSTAGRAM TO DOCUMENT THE PITFALLS OF CAPITALISM.
On Friday, Aaron McCoy decided to deride capitalism after giving a homeless man a dollar, taking a photo of the moment with his iPhone and posting it to instagram.
“The Government sucks and stuff,” he said.
“You can practically smell the neo-liberalism in here”, says McCoy whenever he enters a room, seeking approval from everyone else and getting as much self-satisfaction out of the situation as humanly possible.
“I really like it when he makes statements like that,” said McCoy’s friend, Tony Toes.
“Sometimes I don’t know what I should think, but it’s clear that Aaron’s clearly thought out both sides of the argument, so I just adopt his opinion”
“Sometimes I don’t know what I should think, but it’s clear that Tony’s clearly thought out both sides of the argument, so I just adopt his opinion” said Toes’ friend Tim Leeming, described by his mother as a bright young man, willing to speak his mind.
When asked to justify his viewpoint, McCoy looked bewildered.
“It’s just so obvious, can’t you see?”
However, as of Friday, McCoy has reportedly been courting Alicia Goulding, an ECON 140 student who has recently embraced market forces after she thought about it for about twenty minutes, in no real depth, in that one lecture she went to.
“The Government sucks and stuff,” she said.
Living at her parent’s home in Roseneath, Goulding claimed she “totally got” that it was harder for children in poverty to achieve, but there was no real reason why it should be harder for children in poverty to achieve.
“It’s just so obvious, can’t you see?” she said.
“I’m willing to compromise my moral, political, and economical position for that sweet fine girl,” said McCoy, when asked whether he was romantically compatible with Goulding, considering their ideological differences.
“If that’s not love, then what is?”