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May 26, 2014 | by  | in Bent Opinion |
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Bent

Hey everyone, welcome to BENT, the column where the gender is made up and the sex doesn’t matter! Grindr, Tinder, Brenda. Lots of ‘R’s; welcome to the world of online and mobile dating! Perhaps ‘dating’ is too loose a word.

So what are these sites? Most readers should be familiar with Tinder! Tinder is the app where you ‘meet’ people, and by ‘meet’ I mean ‘judge while you swipe through, occasionally clicking yes on a hottie and hoping they reply’. Tinder is great because unlike most other phone-based ‘meeting’ apps, it has a great variety of people in New Zealand in terms of both gender and sexuality.

Grindr is a huge player in the gay (male) community. It’s basically a slutty version of Facebook because everyone has an account; you can message the closest 100-or-so guys to you in an area. Now while Grindr gets a terrible rep from most people, it is an incredibly important device in the modern-day gay male’s struggle against the patriarchy. Sure, it’s a good way to get sex if you’re bored, hungry or alone. But more importantly, being a minority that cannot be distinguished from other groups by appearance alone, it is hugely important to have a way to meet other people like you. You might not find your true love on Grindr, but meeting people with similar ‘interests’ is still important, yeah?

Grindr is not just great for meeting people for relations; it’s also a great way to get help if you need it. Okay okay, that sounds bad, but I mean I have many friends who have bunked for free in town when they cannot get home (completely free), friends who met flatmates on Grindr, or even people who have bought and sold goods using this multi-purpose application!

It’s pretty good, but you also have to remember that Grindr can be potentially dangerous. Not every guy is amazing and will make you feel safe, so you have to remember your safety. My top tips include always meeting them first in public; if you are going to theirs to do the dance with no pants with someone, make sure you let a friend know. If they come to yours, just keep some of your more valuables kept safe; it has never happened to me because I’m poor (and because escaping my flat is nearly impossible without my assistance), but he could help himself to your stuff while you’re sleeping.

Lastly, use protection: I know this is dumb, and that it’s in nearly every BENT Column, but if he has slept with you, chances are he has done the same with a few other guys from Grindr.

PS Brenda is the female version of Grindr, but apparently it’s boring. Sorry girls, but you will probably find nicer people offline anyway; more chemistry! Or Tinder ;)

Jonny Abbott

UniQ Communications Officer

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