In my eyes Drake can do no wrong. I don’t care how arrogant people claim he is, or how disconnected he is from the hardships that so many great rappers have faced; I will always see the goofy Nickelodeon alum through rose tinted glasses.
But not everyone has been so favourable. In case you live under a rock, Drake has been at the centre of some serious beef these past few weeks. Said beef that got me thinking about all of the other catfights that our seemingly sweeter-than-honey Drizzy has gotten himself into over the years. Like a bad boyfriend you keep running back to, all it takes is a flash of his Hollywood smile to have me weak at the knees all over again. So in an effort to properly establish where we stand, I decided to take a trip down memory lane and revisit some of Drizzy’s very best battles.
Pusha T, May 2012
Who even is Pusha T these days? Good question. And this beef sure as hell didn’t do his B-grade career any favours. Like all great rap wars, this drama was born out of a song Pusha released dissing Drake for signing with Lil Wayne’s label Cash Money. Like two parents fighting over custody, Drake was merely a pawn in a much bigger issue between T and Weezy. Pusha never stood a chance. Moral of the story—never pick fights with rappers whose mentors are 10,000 times more successful than you are.
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Kanye West, July 2009
A couple of passive-aggressive teenage girls these two were. It all began when Kanye directed Drake’s first video back in ‘09 and it was a royal fuck up. Kanye then bailed and left Drake to clean up the mess. They stole each other’s girls, dissed each other in songs, and sent many a Twitter burn. Then, in August 2013, the rap music gods performed some voodoo magic and they somehow patched up the friendship. It was almost too easy. Was the four-year drama nothing more than an extravagant PR stunt? We common folk will never know. I’m calling this one a draw.
Kendrick Lamar, early 2013
With a history more complex than a Home & Away love triangle, I’m not even gonna bother with these two. Where Kendrick released a politically loaded album that will be cherished for years to come, Drake continued to throw stones like a kid in the playground. One point to The Haterz.
Childish Gambino, July 2014
Ahhhh, Childish Gambino. The sexiest, most swoon-worthy rapper of them all (ahem, Magic Mike XXL). Mid-2014 this small fry decided he was ready to play with the big kids and hung Drake out to dry in an interview, saying, “Nah, I ain’t Drake. I sing better. I do better.” As if that wasn’t enough, he came back for round two in December with what might just be the sassiest backhanded compliment of 2014: “I don’t hate Drake at all. I really like Drake, if not for no other reason than he makes me better… I think he’s a really good writer and rapper. Right now, I think I’m better than him.” And that my friends, is how you burn in style.
Meek Mill, July 2015
The beef that tipped me over the edge. Here goes. A few weeks back, Drake made headlines over a catfight that more closely resembles an episode of Real Housewives. Nicki’s current boo (and opening act for her Pinkprint Tour), Meek Mill, started calling Drake out on Twitter. Yip, he pulled the d-bag keyboard warrior move saying, “Stop comparing Drake to me too… he don’t write his own raps!” But Meek fucked up. The so-called ghostwriters were in fact co-writers who were properly credited. So what did Drake do? He dropped not one, but two songs on Soundcloud, calling Meek out. I think it’s safe to say Meek killed the rap battle with his embarrassingly bad rebuttal “Wanna Know”. Drake’s smooth moves win.
Well, that ended in a goddamn draw and I have wasted hours of my life that I’ll never get back, so I’ll finish with this—ignorance is bliss. If you can look past my reality TV obsession, then I can surely turn a blind eye to the many verbal wars you’re waging, and we can all live happily ever after in a diamond encrusted mansion. The end.
The essential Drake vs. The Haterz playlist
- Drake—“Used To”
- Dr. Dre feat. Kendrick Lamar, Justus & Anderson. Paak—“Deep Water”
- Drake—“Charged Up”
- Meek Mill—“Wanna Know”
- Drake—“Back to Back”
- Nick Minaj feat. Drake and Chris Brown—“Only”
- Drake—“No New Friends”
- Childish Gambino—“Sober”
- Dr. Dre feat. King Mez, Marsha Ambrosius & Kendrick Lamar—“Darkside/Gone”