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September 20, 2015 | by  | in The Moan Zone |
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Are we a thing? Part 2

It’s time to take a break from the hilarious new Snapchat update to help a brother in need, because let’s face it—girls actually think about other stuff besides whether or not that one person likes them. The hostel romance/anti-romance really is our area of expertise. So listen up and take notes, because unlike MGMT101, I will not be posting the slides on Blackboard.

Because you have a life, I’m sure you will be going home in the summer—Luke’s the same, Tom on the other hand…

That final week is getting closer and closer. You should be more excited about it than Christmas, because unlike Christmas, you might actually get something worth telling your mates about. We have long said that this year will be over before you know it, and guess what?! We were right!
After a year of uni, you can see just how much the American Pie variety of movies have lied to you. For one thing, it was never windy there.

In part 1, you kinda liked that other guy/girl, but no one apart from you thought you might have a thing, not even them. Haha—especially not them. But now things have changed. The two of you have a real friendship and people are beginning to see that. The most resounding sign of this is the continuation of jokes like “Do you have a girlfriend bro???” and “Where’s _____ bro?” and “What does _____ think about that bro?”

All sarcastic, overblown, excessively loud and sure to freak out that other person if they were to hear. If this sounds familiar then congratulations, you have a thing.

Everyone is now at the stage where it is now weird to get with randoms in town. Not only does this decrease the risk of catching some sort of jungle fever from someone whose name you can’t remember with any certainty, but it’s no longer cool (unless she’s really hot). It took a while, but you’re there. Some of the more diehards will rebuke this, but hey, don’t hate the playa—hate the game.

Now here, class, is what will be in the exam, so listen up. It all comes down to the last week. Exams are over. Everyone is still knocking around the hostel in jandals (we’re writing this while wearing puffer jackets, but don’t worry—your time will come. Unless you’re in Vic House, then you are probably burning your textbooks for warmth and light). You will have your end of year hostel function. This is the day to make it or break it.

Stay tuned.

Luke and Tom.

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Ten things I wish my friends knew about being Māori

: 1). I wish my friends knew that when they ask me what “percentage” of Māori I am—half, quarter, or eighth—they make me feel like a human pie chart. I don’t know how people can ask this so nonchalantly, but they do. So I want to let you know: this is a very threatening