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Last week VUWSA crammed 100 ravenous students into a yellow chain link cattle pen in the Hub with the promise of free pizza and a hug from Chrissy Brown.
Arriving just ten minutes before the AGM was set to take place, the VUWSA President with a passion for fashion, Jonathan Gee, paired a maroon and white chunky knit scarf with a checkered shirt under a grey (possibly cashmere?) sweater.
Former VUWSA President Rick Zwaan was there too, also wearing a bright scarf and sweater combo. Who wore it better you ask? Who cares, this is student politics.
It took eight solid minutes of awkward ‘69’ jokes and nervous babbling to reach quorum. Salient was there in force, although we were a bit busy giggling and tagging VUWSA in quality tweets.
I’ll admit that I fell asleep two minutes into the AGM. Jonathan has the soothing voice of an angel and the caffeine hadn’t kicked in. In his opening speech, he discussed his appearance on Breakfast where he argued with old people about student binge drinking and the inclusion of ‘international act’ G-Eazy in this year’s O-Week festivities.
News editor Kate and I concluded that G-Eazy was definitely bangable. We were promptly broken out of this intelligent conversation by the crowd cheering for VUWSA being bailed out fiddy thousand smackeroos.
Jono continued on with his “soul searching” strategic plan, growing somewhat MORE flustered and shaky—very unlike him. It was clearly heavy stuff. The strategic goals are as follows:
#1 Establish a powerful student voice.
#2 Deepen relationships with student groups in order to “build a collective strength.”
#3 To be visible, approachable, active, and a couple of other things.
#4 Kate skipped this one, so it’s lost 4eva now.
#5 Create a permanently “Student Friendly Wellington.”
The mostly dry questions peaked when one student threw a compliment sandwich at Jono, stroking his ego, then promptly criticising VUWSA’s involvement in campus clubs.
VUWSA Welfare VP Rory Lenihan-Ikin then began the discussion of fairer fares, emphasising how Wellington’s expenny public transport rates for university students compare to other major cities. He then opened up the stage to several suspicious old people who were earlier spotted handing out pamphlets, and were revealed to be regional council candidates. Six of the seven speakers supported VUWSA’s pledge for fairer student transport fares.
Students were then presented with $5 value pizzas and proceeded to turn into wild savages. END.