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September 4, 2016 | by  | in Mates in the States |
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Alive and Kickin’

Greetings from the United States! Holy shit, it’s a big BAD world out here team, but we are in love already. Here are some of our initial observations after three weeks abroad:

  1. Firstly, NO ONE CAN PRONOUNCE THE NAME TESSA. Like, what the actual heck, for an English speaking country, the language barrier 100% exists here. Variations include: Tissa, Teeeesa, and Tassa.
  1. No one can guess where we’re from. The common guesses are either England (naaaah) or Australia (ugh no thanks). Added to this, the usual reaction to us stating we’re from NZ is “omG, LoRD of DA ringz! All BlaCKS!”
  1. The road rules. Firstly, disregard everything you think you know about driving etiquette, it’s useless here. Zebra crossings do not necessarily entitle pedestrians to the right of way (learnt this the hard way), and this friggin’ driving on the other side of the road thing is just ultra-confusing and really unnerving when when you’re sitting in the front seat of a moving vehicle. Also, people use their horns here A LOT.
  1. SUPERSIZE ME. From free refills to unbelievably huge portion sizes, in the Deep South in particular, you’re more likely to see a confederate flag than to come across a fresh vegetable (if you ever want to see something scary, google, “Dixie Outfitters, Lynchburg”). It also seems that when cooking any sort of food, American’s must go “hey, you know what!? We need to add AT LEAST ten more cups of sugar to this, just in case our diabetes isn’t progressed enough!” Seriously, we will arrive back in NZ in five months with blackened teeth, wrecked livers, and only one functioning kidney left between us.
  1. Everyone has been incredibly welcoming towards the two newest Kiwi’s abroad. From being randomly gifted free ice cream (Ben and Jerry’s is DA BOMB btw), to people taking pity on us on the subway when we’re blatantly lost, American’s are surprisingly friendly creatures.

FINALLY, EVERYONE THINKS WE ARE OBSESSED WITH SHEEP ( we low-key are, let’s be real).

Renee and Tessa (plus an added ten kilos) signing out.

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Ten things I wish my friends knew about being Māori

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