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May 7, 2018 | by  | in *News* |
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Is it a Bird? Is it a Plane? No! It’s an Ingenious (no, really) Amalgamation With a Safety Sub-Plot by Air New Zealand

Air New Zealand has released a feature length safety video, appearing on aeroplanes and in theatres. Initially the film was just shown to airline customers. However, some were so blown away that Air New Zealand was inundated with requests to make it accessible on the ground.
The short film tells the story of a young kiwi, called “Kiwlet”, who stumbles upon a filming location for a generic fantasy film which is definitely The Lord of The Rings. She befriends the cast and crew of the movie, teaching them how to play rugby while they inexplicably show Kiwlet how to survive in the wild, which involves a lot of info-dumps about the natural history and edgy beauty of New Zealand for no apparent reason.
The video stops in four places when the plot is most exciting to display still images of aeroplane exits, oxygen masks, and life jackets, which are identical to the ones in the pamphlet in the seat pocket.
Safety with Kiwlet opened in theatres on 2 May 2018 to rave reviews. The New Zealand Herald said it was “an enthralling celebration of New Zealand values,” and a representative from Stuff lauded it as “an incredible example of capitalising on shallow stereotypes about New Zealand”.
On some of Air New Zealand’s shorter flights, such as the Wellington to Nelson service, customers have been forced to stay onboard the aircraft for up to an hour after landing to finishing watching the video.
Safety with Kiwlet is rated PG for “mature themes” (Kiwlet has a tragic backstory involving her parents being eaten by a swarm of rats, which look only somewhat like miniature orcs), and is in theatres now.

*Disclaimer: This is shit news.*

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