Viewport width =
October 1, 2018 | by  | in *News* |
Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

International Enrolment Skyrockets

International student enrolments are at an all-time high, following the University’s decision to drop “Victoria” from its name. In just under a week, the number of international enrolments for next year has risen 341%, as students from Victoria Universities of Melbourne, Canada, Hong Kong, Bangladesh, and Uganda realised their mistake.
“I mean I just googled Victoria University and Melbourne was the first one that came up,” one prospective student told Salient. “I should have known something was up when I got there and I couldn’t find the tuatara, but I didn’t question it. I’m so glad the council cleared this up!”
Some are beginning to wonder if the name change was too effective — if student numbers continue to rise, will university infrastructure be able to cope? Extensions to new science block Te Toki a Rata are already in the works, while the former School of Art History, Classics and Religious Studies is being considered for new laboratory space. Work will begin as soon as contractors have finished repairing the library lifts, meaning large lectures will be held in Kelburn Park for the foreseeable future.
At least one confused VUW student has accidentally enrolled at Victoria University of Uganda.

*Disclaimer: This is shit news*

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Pin on PinterestTweet about this on Twitter

About the Author ()

Add Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Recent posts

  1. You Are Not Your Illness
  2. Let Me at The Bachelor, and Other Shit Chat
  3. Lost in the Sauce – Avo-no you didn’t
  4. Mauri Ora – Winter’s Comin’
  5. Token Cripple – How To Survive Your First Year at University (with a disabled twist!)
  6. Dream Diagnosis – Fire in Wellington
  7. Liquid Knowledge – Animal farts and performative veganism
  8. One Ocean
  9. Uni Council Corner
  10. Dylan Horrocks gets new job

Editor's Pick

He Tāonga

:   I wanted to write this piece, in order to connect to all tauira within the University, with the hope that we can all remind ourselves that we are a part of an environment which is valuable, no matter our culture, our beliefs or our skin colour. The ultimate purpose of this