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March 18, 2019 | by  | in Ask Agatha |
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Ask Sissy – Issue 03

I’m in university, dating my first boyfriend! I’ve been dating this one guy for about six months. I’m about to meet his parents. I love the boy. He’s awesome and hilarious and sweet. But…he’s going on to postgrad, while I’ve got 2–3 more years left.

I feel extremely guilty for thinking that, in the future, I might want to break up because I want to have experience with other types of guys, but a small part of me tells me that I should not be “tied down” my whole uni life, especially to the only boy I’ve ever kissed. What if I marry him one day? I feel like I don’t want to get married without experiencing the rest of the dating world a little bit. Besides, what if he wants to meet new girls at his new school?

 

Listen to your intuition! It’s understandable you’re reluctant to let your first love go, especially as there haven’t been any real problems or issues, but the reality of the situation is hard for you to ignore. I think you’re being mature about this. He’s going away, you’ve still got a few years of study left, you’ve got a bunch of self-discovery you want to do; you’d like to be available for other experiences and he likely feels the same way. That doesn’t mean your relationship didn’t work out! You’re at a crossroads in your life and it’s important to take stage directions from the universe (RuPaul, 2015). This relationship has likely boosted your confidence and provided you with some new tools and insights going forward, therefore this relationship will always be special. Talk, agree to remain friendly, and if you’re meant to be together in the future, your paths will cross again. X

 

Need advice? I want to support you! Send your queries and concerns to sissyatsalient@gmail.com (strict anonymity assumed unless you specify otherwise).

 

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:   I wanted to write this piece, in order to connect to all tauira within the University, with the hope that we can all remind ourselves that we are a part of an environment which is valuable, no matter our culture, our beliefs or our skin colour. The ultimate purpose of this