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AuthorKii Small

Author Archive: Kii Small

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May 13, 2019

I arrived a little too early and decided to have a hot chocolate while I waited. As a man, I was nervous and intimidated to have a conversation with Olie. Sitting somewhere in between, ‘tampons and pads don’t make me queasy’ and ‘I have not the slightest clue what period poverty is’, I was ready […]

April 8, 2019

  In 2018, it was revealed that Boulcott Hall were serving undercooked chicken to residents that was “bloody and red”. Now, its neighbour up the road is serving pasta with a side of maggots. Katherine Jermyn Hall residents received more than they bargained for when they were served “weird shit” at dinner last month.   […]

April 1, 2019

I grab my half-full glass of Prosecco and take a lustful sip. The smell of chamomile tea and marijuana wafts in from the kitchen. There are three bowls in my peripheral vision:   The first bowl: small, filled with green and black pitted olives. Sitting beside it, a medium sized bowl, overflowing with tight, red, […]

March 18, 2019

In the last few years, halls of residence at Victoria University of Wellington have been a breeding ground for contagious diseases. Wellington’s reputation for ‘damp, cold and mouldy’ housing is uninviting for many newcomers and isn’t helped by the inevitable ‘fresher flu’ that follows an influx of 20,000 new residents. With reports of staff and […]

February 25, 2019

Staring at the stars, I feel the wet grass soaking my grey sweatpants, creating a wet patch from my calf muscle to the top of my butt. My socks smell of the stagnant water that’s gone through the holes of my shoes, and there’s no way I can afford a new pair of either. I’m […]

October 15, 2018

This month, for the seventh straight month in a row, the latest climate change report has been released to remind us that we’re fucked if we don’t act now. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) released their report last Sunday that explains how much global warming is actually “not here to play your little […]

October 8, 2018

My phone was connected to the bluetooth speaker in the kitchen playing the new Cozy Tapes Vol. II over the sound of a boiling kettle. I don’t often take in all the lyrics from A$AP Mob. They don’t deliver any Deltron 3030 or Kendrick Lamar lyricism that I have to dissect for weeks in between […]

September 17, 2018

This week, the elevators on Kelburn Campus are back in operation and allowing students to travel between the 3rd and 7th floor without the need for stairs. Students and staff are flabbergasted that the second coming of Jesus Christ has not come prior to the elevator repair. “Honestly, I’m shocked. This whole time I thought […]

August 20, 2018

This week Louise is snowed under with a bunch of editorial work and cannot do her editorial letter to all of you readers. So you’re stuck with the person that sits parallel to her in the office and whose job description is so dissimilar that she forgets I work here at times. This week, I […]