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AuthorLong Meat Marcus

Author Archive: Long Meat Marcus

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September 3, 2019

I wanted the new Jordans and I wasn’t even good at basketball. I wonder whatever happened  to my Total 90s. I remember pleading and begging my dad for the new boots. Maroon with a touch of white, worn by Thierry Henry and Samuel Eto’o; the slickest things on the field. The Total 90s to be […]

March 11, 2019

There is growing speculation at Otago University around the relationship between student magazine Critic Te Arohi and its most popular son, the Critic Booze Reviews (CBR).   What began as a playful, fun review of alcoholic beverages intermingled with quality banter has turned into a bloodthirsty power struggle. CBR has exploded in size in since […]

February 25, 2019

On February 13, we were forced to love and leave our favourite 15-year-old in the cold red deserts of our imagination.   Taking humanity farther than it had ever been before, the Mars Rover (Opportunity) blitzed the competition for Best Teenager in the Universe for the third year in a row. Commentators suggest the win […]

September 24, 2018

Vice Chancellor and our favourite veterinarian Grant Guilford is rumoured to have said “are we a DHB or are we a university?” during a staff forum recently at the university. His statement was in response to the growing outrage and protests over student health at Vic. In response to his comments, we at the Salient […]

February 22, 2015

The Jono and Ben at Ten presenter on awkward non-dates, piles of mush, and his dreams of revenge against the Cambridge Hotel.

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