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AuthorSasha Beattie

Author Archive: Sasha Beattie

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May 15, 2017

I’m trying to be optimistic by looking at the year as nearly halfway over so here are, in no particular order, ten of the shittest yarns that I have heard thus far in 2017:   “VUW is 100% Smoke Free.” If I’m sitting underneath a Smoke Free sign outside university at 7.50am, holding a cup […]

May 1, 2017

This one night, my flatmate and I decided to play an ill-conceived game called Drink Everything In The House. One thing led to another, and, well, you know how girls get after half a bottle of week-open wine and a can of Smirnoff Ice. So this guy I matched with on Tinder came over, let’s […]

April 3, 2017

My love for The Bachelor is kinda like my taste in men: I love trash. Both these preferences could be described as atrocities that you can only bear witness to in abject horror with one eye covered by a pillow; both solicit the obvious question, “what’s the fucking point?” I realise that The Bachelor epitomises […]

March 20, 2017

“Enough, with the femmo propaganda bullshit Sash.” Ye okay; I intended to give y’all just the tip last week but I really did go balls deep into that one, sorry team. What can I say? I’m an avid SJW and I take pride in my work. Lighter topics! Politics! Have you ever extensively hypothesised over […]