Author Archive: Wilbur Townsend

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Great Expectations

Great Expectations

by / June 4, 2013 / [ 7 Comments ]

Why you should be angry at the Government for subsidising your degree.

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Demystifying the Budget

Demystifying the Budget

by / May 20, 2013 / No Comments

Politicians and political hacks like to pretend they know much more about the world than you do. They use a whole lot of wanky jargon, hoping you think they are smarter than they really are. Luckily, Salient is here to fix that. Welcome to our guide to decoding the budget.

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C.R.E.A.M. – Cash Rules Everything Around Me

C.R.E.A.M. – Cash Rules Everything Around Me

by / October 15, 2012 / No Comments

Paternalism is paternalism, and it is crude to dress it as anything else.
The public health belligerents are cocking their weapons. Proposals like fat taxes and the outright prohibition of certain foods are patronising, ignoring the value of our choices.

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C.R.E.A.M. – Cash Rules Everything Around Me

C.R.E.A.M. – Cash Rules Everything Around Me

by / September 17, 2012 / No Comments

‘Hide and Seek’ is a masterpiece, and ‘Whatcha Say’ has less artistic merit than most dog poops.

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C.R.E.A.M.

C.R.E.A.M.

by / August 13, 2012 / No Comments

The World Travel & Tourism Council expect only a 1 per cent increase in 2012’s British tourism spending, because the Olympics discourage the sport-apathetic from visiting.

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C.R.E.A.M

C.R.E.A.M

by / July 30, 2012 / No Comments

WATER THE FUCK Water, I’m reliably informed, is important. Without it everybody dies quite quickly. Combine that importance with a hearty dose of racism and we can understand why, over the last few weeks, Tangata Whenua water rights have dominated political discourse. As the Waitangi Tribunal focuses on our country’s rivers, it’s time to ask: [...]

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Eurozone: A Crisis Explained

Eurozone: A Crisis Explained

by / July 23, 2012 / No Comments

With banks, bonds and German bullies, the ongoing chaos in Europe is not only frightening, but also bewildering. Salient explains the crisis.

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C.R.E.A.M. – On North Korea: Calm The Fuck Down Bro

C.R.E.A.M. – On North Korea: Calm The Fuck Down Bro

by / June 5, 2012 / No Comments

If the warmongers are to be believed, we are slipping into nuclear apocalypse. They insist that a tyrannical and insane North Korean executive is plotting to exact nuclear oblivion upon the Western world. Recent news seems to confirm this: the Musudan-ri missile launch site is nearing completion and rumours of another nuclear detonation are abound. [...]

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C.R.E.A.M. – Money And Mauls

C.R.E.A.M. – Money And Mauls

by / May 21, 2012 / 1 Comment

A humble giant is on his knees. A staunch but modest beast, the 21st Century is proving too tough. The Otago Rugby Football Union is on the bench, and recovery isn’t looking good. Rugby has always been at the heart of the South. But the sport’s governing body is deep in debt and, despite a [...]

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Is Capitalism Compatible with Saving the Planet?

Is Capitalism Compatible with Saving the Planet?

by / May 14, 2012 / [ 3 Comments ]

Wilbur ‘Moonbeam Townsend and Nicholas ‘Capitalist Pig-Dog’ Cross go head-to-head.

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