Thanks to the whole Springs whānau for keeping me grounded. Thanks to the fantastic University staff that I’ve worked with this year, there are far too many of you to mention but you know who you are! Thanks to Nikky and Aidan from NT, and Andre from PSC.

Thank you to AVC Dame Winnie Laban and Gerard for guiding me throughout the year. Thanks Fletch and Harrison and VUWLSS. Thank you to my amazing staff. You don’t get nearly enough credit as you deserve. Thank you to Salient for not roasting me too hard. Thanks Jono and Caity from NZUSA. You kept me sane. Thank you to my amazing exec. We’ve had a hectic year, and we’ve achieved a lot. Though there have been ups and downs, you are still my exec and I have only love for all of you! Leading such an awesome team has been a blessing and we have made some significant changes this year.

Finally, a big thanks to you the students. I’ve spent this year being constantly inspired by all of you. We have dealt with massive issues as a community, and we’ve also had a lot of fun. My philosophy has always been that when students speak for themselves, it’s more powerful than anything I or any other exec member can say. I have always believed VUWSA to be a platform for that and nothing more, all the power is in our community, in the hands of our students.

It’s been a blast. Good luck to next year’s exec and the big boss Tam. You’re gonna kill it.
I’ve got two more years of study here, so I’ll still be round getting amongst the activism. If you want to stay in touch then I got social media everywhere. You know the name (@marlondrake). And remember when you see the giant with glasses, you can always come and say hello.

Lena says: I think firstly it would be great to figure out how you can talk to your partner. Even if you end up having to go through the medical system and look at physiological causes, you don’t want to be going through that without the support of your partner – or while you continue to be vague about your reasons for not wanting to have sex.

Emphasise that you know he never meant to hurt you and be honest about why you didn’t speak up (e.g. not wanting to spoil the mood, disappoint him etc). If he perceives your relationship as being caring and honest, he may find it hard to understand why you hadn’t spoken up sooner, so take time to explore what was going on for you with him. There are pressures you may feel around sex that he may not have experienced, so some time might need to be spent talking through those as well.
Your hesitance to tell him what has been going on is really normal, but it will likely only grow stronger the longer you avoid having the conversation. You could write out what you would like to say to him before you have the conversation, as this can often make clear to you what the key things are that you want to express. As well as having this conversation, it will be REALLY important going forward that you work on your ability to be honest in the moment about what feels good and what doesn’t, so your partner can feel confident that he will not hurt you again without realising it.

Dad says: So many women get into situations like this, and I’m assuming from this message that that is how you identify. If you are going to change this pattern you will need to talk to your partner about what’s going on. But in order to work out what needs to change, you have to try and work out the cause of the pain.
It is worth considering if there are physical reasons. Especially if you previously have had sex that wasn’t painful, try and work out what’s changed. Arousal and lubrication can be affected by many common medications including antidepressants, birth control pills, antihistamines and more.
If there’s nothing obvious like that, working out physical causes isn’t always easy and it’s really wise to see a specialist sexual health physician. Common causes can include untreated infections (thrush, herpes, chlamydia, UTIs, etc), endometriosis, scarring, eczema, problems or infections in your pelvis, uterus, ovaries, or cervix.
However before you go off to the doctor, consider this — the MOST common cause for painful sex is relational: Not waiting till you are really turned on and lubricated before penetrative sex. Rushing things is really common, especially if you feel your partner will be frustrated or impatient. Trouble is, if you are moving to intercourse on someone else’s timetable, you are likely to not be ready, and there’s likely to be friction, which hurts (and also is likely to cause microscopic abrasions that make you more prone to infections – meaning that a problem that started out as behavioural can turn medical).
The good news is this most common cause is the easiest to fix. Working out what you need to get really turned on and sharing it with your partner can be a really pleasurable outcome of a difficult situation.

I’m guessing that reaching out to a fellow human being is part of that. Connection with others is integral to recovery from any breakup. Other people remind us of who we can be, rather than what we have lost.

“There ain’t no cure for love,” said Leonard Cohen.

Some relief may be found in the present moment. In appreciating beauty. In accepting comfort from others and being compassionate to ourselves. In holding lightly to the contents of our reactive mind. Take one day at a time, as a pathway to peace.

-Louise Lin

I’m Kii, the big kid from Kaitaia that has his name mispronounced more than the word “GIF”. This year I managed Salient FM and I’ve written a few feature articles for Salient like “Why I Gotta Be Misogynistic”, “Denim Overalls are my One Weakness” and the writing on the bathroom walls that ask you the deepest “would you rather” questions. Last night I made tiramisu for dinner, and I often forget to eat breakfast before 10AM. Four years ago I came into Salient on the back of charisma and a fake mixtape, and they still haven’t noticed that I’m not meant to be here.
And I’m Taylor, an uprooted New Orleans girl questioning the validity of VooDoo, vegan baked goods, and twerking (I rate two of the three). I entered the Salient game mid 2018. I’ve edited your news section, and learned a lot about Vic in the process. Y’all deal with a lot of shit, and I hope that Kii and I can make Salient a safe place for your own civil discourse and paces to self-actualisation. Love yourself this summer. Spend some time with humans (and dogs) that make you want to be your best self.
This year, we’ve teamed up to bring you Salient Mag in 2019.
Interested in a paid editorial role? We’ve got heaps. We need a sub, a news and a few section (film, podcast, etc) editors for 2019. We’re also looking for three feature writers to bring in the academic year with a bang. Flick us an email at editor@salient.org.

-Taylor Galmiche and Kii Small

There are some consistencies though. Salient has always been put together by editorial staff with little formal training, getting paid far too little to do far too much. It has always relied on volunteer contributors, students with something to say having a crack at saying it, to fill the pages. It’s that amateur, irreverent spirit that gives Salient its charm. Some of the best writing I’ve read in the last few years has been in Salient. Some of the most half-baked reckons I’ve read in the last few years have also been in Salient. That’s student media, baby.
Salient has also been a consistent breeding ground for young journalistic talent. Some of New Zealand’s best journalists cut their teeth in the Salient offices. If you listen to Morning Report you’ve heard 1970s Salient contributor and technical editor Gyles Beckford deliver the business news, and you’ve heard 2010 Salient editor Sarah Robson in her role as Social Issues reporter. If you read The Spinoff, editor Toby Manhire’s editorial career peaked when he took the reins of Salient in 1997. If you read the Herald (and you should read the Herald, and you should definitely stop making tired jokes about how the Herald is bad, don’t @ me) you might have read the work of Simon Wilson (Salient editor, 1978) or Keith Ng (Salient news editor, 2004-2005).
Salient has broken some really important stories in and around campus this year. The design and illustrations have been fucking slick. There’s been heaps of fantastic feature writing and columns. It’s done the eighty years of history behind it proud.
If you don’t agree, if you think there’s something Salient could be doing better, remember that Salient lives and dies by the efforts of Vic students. Simon Wilson put it well in an editorial seeking contributors in 1978:

Salient will continue to take informed and critical stance towards the various issues facing students and people generally, and will often be the only media organ in the city prepared to do so. It will continue to provide a forum for debate on those issues. Is there a place for you on it?