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Horoscope

October 9, 2017

We would like to take this opportunity to thank our readers for trusting us with their lives and futures. Our final horoscopes offer advice for you star babies to embrace as you travel through the rest of your time on beautiful planet Earth. Maybe not much longer… @DPRK @DonaldTrump — Aubergine and Celeste   Libra […]

September 25, 2017

Celeste is MIA this week, because Aubergine forgot to tell them that horoscopes are due, so Aubergine has to speed write these under the light of the #moon and #stars. Readers can enjoy their life in this new left wing government (#psychic) by finding out what their star sign’s summer bevvo is. — Aubergine   […]

August 14, 2017

We hope our readers are absolutely hooning all the Astrological energy that Leo is offering this month, and taking time to think about how they will best exercise their democratic right to vote in the upcoming September 23 election. — Aubergine and Celeste Leo: Jul 23–Aug 22 You are on the astrological equivalent of pingers […]

July 31, 2017

We hope that our beautiful friends are feeling ready for a August full of turbulent Planetary motions. — Aubergine and Celeste   Leo: Jul 23–Aug 22 *rawr* Leos are full of animal instincts this week, as you feel invigorated by a collection of planetary movements. Love will be found in financial institutions so be sure […]

July 17, 2017

We hope you are feeling emotionally healed after the full moon on July 9, a nice university break, and the release of Lorde’s Melodrama. — Aubergine and Celeste   Cancer: Jun 21–Jul 22 Retrograde planets are absolutely ruining your emotional stability, which isn’t good at the best of times anyway. It is a time to […]

May 29, 2017

Buckle up astrological children, it’s Gemini Season! Gemini is the first air element of the zodiac, so prepare for some crazy energy. Under the influence of a Gemini planetary cycle, we’ll all be inclined to spend time with friends and focus on changing the world one idea at a time. Or something.   Gemini: May […]

May 15, 2017

Nothing says liberal student magazine like an amalgamation of star signs and political commentary! So here are your horoscopes for the week, which have been inexplicably combined with an MP who shares your star sign to see how their life can inspire your’s.   Taurus: Apr 20–May 20 Andrew Little Bulls are known for being […]

May 1, 2017

As they say, mo’ money, mo’ problems, so thank you baby boomers for having free tertiary education and then taking away our right to do the same. Find out what is going to happen with the last of your $$ in this fortnight’s horoscope section.   Taurus: Apr 20–May 20 WOW, you are going to […]

April 3, 2017

*Aubergine and Celeste hope their readers are feeling refreshed after last week’s new moon in Aries*   Aries: March 21–April 19 This is your time, friend! Stick to your gunz! This is the start of a six-month cycle of getting back to you, so get to work on any solo projects you’ve been dreaming up. […]