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March 10, 2008 | by  | in Opinion |
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Top 5 70 year olds

1) Salient
2) Jim Anderton
3) Kofi Annan
4) Peter Snell
5) Gary Gygax

Top 5 Cool things that happened in 1938

1) Salient was started
2) Superman & Bugs Bunny were created 3
) War of the Worlds broadcast
4) Adolf Hitler was Time magazines ‘Man of the Year’
5) Vatican recognizes Franco’s government in Spain

Top 5 Salient Editors

1) Roger Steele
2) Xenu
3) Michael Appleton
4) G. Palm
5) Brunswick

Top 5 Pussys

1) Sandy Rankin
2) Salem
3) Jenna Jameson’s
4) Robert Ford (they’re pretty much the same thing anyways)
5) Simba

Top 5 Ways to skin a cat

1) The ol’ fashioned way
2) Get in a rabbi
3) Sulphuric acid
4) Take it into Satay Kingdom
5) Give it chemo

Top 5 Radical Gay L337 agendas

1) Maoism
2) Quasi military training camps in the Urewera’s
3) 01101100 00110011 00110011 00110111 00100000 01101000 01000000 00111110 00111100
4) Sticking it to the man
5) Sticking it in the man

Top 5 sexual acts involving pooze

1) The Cleveland Steamer
2) Space Docking
3) The Barracuda/Shocker
4) Dirty Sanchez
5) Eskimo Pie

Top 5 things said when I wrote the above top 5.

1) Oh my gosh!
2) I’ve got a semi
3) That’s not funny
4) There is nothing spiritual about it
5) An Eskimo pie is when you shit on a person’s face, come on it, and it looks like an Eskimo pie. Mmmmmmmm, steamy!

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About the Author ()

Salient is a magazine. Salient is a website. Salient is an institution founded in 1938 to cater to the whim and fancy of students of Victoria University. We are partly funded by VUWSA and partly by gold bullion that was discovered under a pile of old Salients from the 40's. Salient welcomes your participation in debate on all the issues that we present to you, and if you're a student of Victoria University then you're more than welcome to drop in and have tea and scones with the contributors of this little rag in our little hideaway that overlooks Wellington.

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Editor's Pick

Uncomfortable places: skin.

:   Where are you from?  My list was always ready: England, Ireland, Scotland, Wales, puppy dogs’ tails, a little Spanish, maybe German, and—almost as an afterthought—half Samoan. An unwanted fraction.   But you don’t seem like a Samoan. I thought you were [inser

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