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March 19, 2012 | by  | in News |
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POPE BENEDICT SMELLS LIKE A RAW DOG IN THE FOREST

Pope Benedict XVI is smelling better than a freshly transubstantiated goblet of blood these days following the release of his eau de cologne, made for exclusive use on his wrists and neck. Smell-maker Silvana Casoli said she wanted to recreate the smell of the German woods and wildlife of the pontiff’s childhood. To do this she imagined the smells he would smell “when praying at the Grotto of Lourdes”.

Casoli has previously made scents for the general clergy, ‘Water of Hope’ and ‘Water of Faith’, but Benedict ain’t sharing this one. However comments on a major news site indicate that the public are less than impressed, with one asking whether the cologne is ”made from the tears of children”. Another asked whether it was being used “to mask the stink of corruption”. 9 Salient opines that he probably just wants to smell good while rolling about in the popemobile and avoiding condoms and eager nuns.

SARKOZY’S SON IS A CUNT

Apparently throwing random shit at police officers is très chic if you’re a Parisian teen.
French President Nicolas Sarkozy was forced to eat humble pie this week after his 15-year-old son Louis and his friends threw tomatoes, rolled-up paper and marbles at a policewoman from the courtyard of the Elysée.

Despite the President’s tough position on crime, charges were dropped after he fronted up with an apology on behalf of his son. We can only assume that Louis was too busy to do the same.

SMOKING: NOT OUR FUTURE; DESTROYING OUR PAST

Two Slovakian tween-rebels accidentally set a historical monument on fire earlier this month when they took their experimentation with smoking from behind the school bike- sheds to the base of a 700-year-old castle.

The boys, aged 11 and 12, were found at the Krasna Horka castle by emergency services who had been called to the site of the burning fortress. Although damage to the castle was extensive, the Slovak National Museum reported that about 90 per cent of historical collections were saved. The moral of the story? Smoking not only harms your unborn baby, but a big hunk of gothic architecture, too.

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