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March 18, 2019 | by  | in UniQ |
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Uni Q – Where we come from?

Wouldn’t you know it, it’s only our second column for the year and ya boy already has writer’s block (bodes well, I know). All my attempts to adhere to this week’s theme have resulted in disastrous columns attempting to do too much with the little room we have. Who could’ve guessed getting queer people to remember where we come from is not as easy as it is for others? So as I sit behind our clubs expo stall (praying I don’t have to take over), I’ve decided to just say fuck it.

Despite the number of people I grew up with who turned out to be queer, it is only recently that I have been able to connect with them in a meaningful manner and embrace my own queerness. My queer upbringing, so to speak, was an isolated and ignorant one.

Anxiety, internalised homophobia, and all those other delightful staples of queer childhood dominated my time. I spent so long trying to avoid entertaining the idea of any connection to queerness, and for a while it worked. But as you can see, it didn’t last.

There are lessons, I think, in remembering where I come from. Not for any kind of positive memories or sense of stability, but as a reminder of the progress I have made as an individual (and as I write this, I realise this is what my counsellor has been trying to convince me of). Remembering where I come from reminds me that it is a place I don’t want to go back to. Life might not always get better but that doesn’t mean it won’t.

And that is something I hope other people can take away from this hot mess of a column. Where you come from might not be great, where you are now might not be either, but that doesn’t mean that change isn’t on its way.

 

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