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June 3, 2019 | by  | in Features Homepage |
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My Time in a Throuple and the Friends I Made Along the Way

Let’s go back to the not-so-distant past of 2018. The main character of this story, yours truly, was sitting in a bar with her good friend, lamenting the lack of suitable one-night companions.

How did I get there? Well, my boyfriend of one-and-a-half years had broken up with me two months earlier and I was loving—and I mean ^loving—the single life and my newfound freedom. This involved me going out to the bar/pub/club on most weekends, and even some weeknights! My (also recently single) bar-buddy became friends with the various bartenders around the place, who enjoyed listening to our stories of hook-ups and bad Tinder dates.

We didn’t always go out to get laid. We often just danced, talked, drank, and people-watched. But we did get lucky, and in my case, doubly so.

B and I rocked up to our favourite cocktail bar and grabbed a table upstairs when a beautiful girl, J, came and sat across from us. I immediately got some vibes from her, so I struck up a conversation. We were both into tattoos, pottery, and were interested in the zero-waste movement—we hit it off. I was hopeful that I may have actually met someone I might be interested in dating. And if she wasn’t into ladies, she would be a pretty cool friend to have. However, these hopes were dashed when her boyfriend T showed up.

I tried to hide my disappointment and continued to dazzle them both with my tipsy babbling, regaling them with my Tinder nightmares… when J mentioned that she and T had used Tinder to try to find a girl who would like to join them for a threesome.

I couldn’t believe my luck! I had always fantasised about being the meat in a bisexual threesome sandwich, and now I had a chance to make it a reality.

I turned to B to let her know my plan and ask if she would be okay getting home without me (girls gotta stick together). As it turned out, she had met a nice boy and gave me her blessing to go and live my vivacious truth.

At this point, I had finished three gimlets and two shots of Chartreuse, which explained my boldness in telling J to grab T and follow me.

Luckily, I lived just down the road from the bar, and both of my flatmates would be asleep by this point. The whole way home, I was running through how I was going to make this work. I had seen some threesome porn, but these were highly produced films with titles like “milf threesome double penetration gang bang extravaganza” and didn’t really appeal to me.

Turns out, I didn’t need to worry. Once we got to my room, J and I laid T on the bed and told him to watch as we started making out and taking each other’s clothes off. Things seemed to flow really naturally, and soon we were all tumbling about and enjoying ourselves.

Afterwards, we swapped numbers and promised to keep in touch.

I woke up the next morning, unsure if the events of last night had actually transpired. When I rolled over to check my phone, I could confirm the events of last night were a reality, as J and T had both texted, thanking me for the previous night and asking me to go to dinner.

And thus began my life as part of a polyamorous throuple. We would go out for dinner (they would pay, since I was a poor student at the time). We would laugh, drink, and bang. This whole arrangement worked perfectly for us. Both J and I were bisexual women, and T loved having two ladies giving him some TLC. They got to enjoy a functioning and loving couple dynamic, and I was free to stay uncommitted and focus all my mental and emotional energy into my third year of university, rather than a partner.

But, as the old cliché goes, all good things must come to an end. I started noticing T giving me more attention, texting me more often, and focussing on me more than J during sex. It was clear he was starting to prefer spending time with me, since he tried to organise meetups where it was just us two.

Once this started happening, I decided I had to end it. I wasn’t going to be the reason a loving couple broke up, and I wasn’t interested in pursuing a relationship with T. So one weekend when T and J invited me out to dinner, I declined and told them that I was going to spend more time focussing on uni and finishing my degree.

They took it well. I deleted their numbers, and they never texted me back afterwards. I like to think things are amicable between us, and, according to Instagram, the two of them are still together and loving it.

I don’t regret a moment of being in a throuple. I loved the attention, the sex, and the time we all spent together just shooting the shit and being friends. If the opportunity presents itself, go for it. You never know what kind of friends you might make on the way.

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