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AuthorAuntie Sharon

Author Archive: Auntie Sharon

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October 10, 2011

Don’t be an arsehole. It’ll come back to bite you. I don’t believe in karma, but I do think that Wellington and New Zealand, and even London, are really small, and the more people you piss off the more likely you are to have awkward moments every day. Surround yourself with people who like you […]

October 2, 2011

Dear Auntie Shaz and Dr Quaffer, I’m about to embark on an adventure around Asia—I’ve got $1000, a backpack full of clothes, a ticket to Bangkok, and no plans. What’s the best fun I can have? Thanks, Jeff. Dear Jeff, Dr Quaffer here. Well, a grand can go quite far in South East Asia. It […]

September 25, 2011

I’m sorry to be the one to burst your bubble, but there is no ‘one’. There is no ‘one’ person who will make you feel complete, and no soul mate waiting for your serendipitous arrival. You are not one half of a jigsaw, just waiting to be clipped together with your other half. In my […]

September 19, 2011

I don’t envy those of you about to graduate from university. There’s a recession still meandering on, and worse, there’s a government in power who seem to think that the public service is an evil like no other. That’s bad news for those of you with BAs, who have been sheltered from the real world […]

September 12, 2011

Ah, the one-night stand. It’s a Kiwi classic. There’s something about our heady mix of sexual repression and enthusiasm for binge-drinking that makes us ripe for the one-night stand picking. For many in our ranks, it’s even the preferred way of starting what may turn out to be a meaningful relationship*. Unfortunately, more often than […]

September 5, 2011

I’ll admit—I’m a Green voter. Each election, just to be safe, I give my other vote to Labour. And I hate John Key. In my opinion, he’s a limp dick of a man with little nous about anything but how to make money. Though even that he seems more inclined to do for himself and […]

August 15, 2011

Dear Auntie, There’s this guy, he’s in my lecture, and he is très cute. I want some excuse to talk to him, but I don’t know what that is! How do I do this? Should I cut my losses and do nothing? I don’t know! Help! Love, très shy. Uncle Daz reckons that guys love […]

August 1, 2011

I used to be able answer the question of what I was going to do when I grew up with ease—a ballerina, zookeeper, astronaut, princess, or rock star. Anything that involved cute animals, dressing up or rockets was bound to make me wildly successful and famous. My well-meaning parents backed me up, telling me I […]

July 25, 2011

Dear Shaz, I live in a really great flat—cheap, big, plenty of sunshine and with two flatmates I love. Trouble is that the ‘other’ flatmate is a total dick. He quit uni a couple of months ago, and now he just sits around smoking weed and sulking, leaving a trail of filth and takeaways in […]

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