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AuthorUther Dean

Author Archive: Uther Dean

Uther was one of the two arts editors in 2009. He was the horoscopier and theatre writer in 2010. Alongside Elle Hunt, Uther was coeditor in 2011.

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April 23, 2012

You still never ask for help even when you really need it If you’ve been keeping up with this column so far you will already be thoroughly aware of your own lack of specialness. You are an individual insofar as you are not biologically conjoined to any other fully autonomous being. Beyond that, you and me […]

April 2, 2012

I’d like to see an elephant write Ulysses. So there.

March 26, 2012

Life is disappointing and that Fact will never hurt any less You are a fraud. You do not know what you are doing. People look at you like you’ve got it at least a little sorted so often that occasionally you can even trick yourself into believing it to be true. But it’s not. A […]

March 19, 2012

KNOW WHEN TO HOLD ‘EM, KNOW WHEN TO FOLD ‘EM, KNOW WHEN TO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP SERIOUSLY DUDE Like all languages English is riddled with lacunas. Also called a lexical gap, a lacuna is a common concept that we don’t have a word for. The most commonly cited example is that we have […]

March 12, 2012

You’re an idiot. But that’s okay because everyone else is one too. We get so attached to our ideas and beliefs. They sit inside our head, right inside us, just behind our eyes. They are part of us. That’s why it’s so hard to take criticism. When someone picks at your ideas or thoughts or […]

March 4, 2012

WE JUST HAVE TO GET OVER THE FACT THAT MOST PEOPLE ARE WRONG MOST OF THE TIME. I have been thinking about Tommy Wiseau a lot recently. In case you don’t know, he’s the guy who wrote, directed, produced and starred in The Room. It’s terrible. The Room, that is. It is a badly written, […]

February 27, 2012

You’ll have heard all this before. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter. We have all been indoctrinated with the myth of the epiphany. That, in one moment, everything can change. Books, TV, and films all tell us that our lives are linear, causal narratives. This is a convenient fiction. You are not the full stop at the end of a run-on sentence of existence.

September 19, 2011

Now, boys, circle round, it seems there are few things it looks like we need to talk about. Just a quick check up that we’re all on the same page when it comes to, y’know, being good people. Well, number one is, well, we all know that men aren’t the victims of modern society, right? […]

September 5, 2011

About three months ago I realised that I was profoundly unhappy. Not just a little sad. Not a bit iffy. Profoundly sad. And this was not just a bad day or moment. I had felt that way for as long as I could remember. I just had never really noticed it. Well, that’s not true. […]

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