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We Drank This So You Wouldn’t Have To

July 12, 2015

Cost: $3 Alcohol Volume: 4% (2.4 standard drinks) Pairing: Dixie Chicks Verdict: ★★★★ “If you’ve tasted beer, you know what this tastes like.” At the outset, we think it’s probably quite important to talk about Rihanna’s new video. Which is great, right? Or maybe it’s not great? Are we allowed to tell people we like it? […]

June 1, 2015

Cost: $8.99 Alcohol Volume: 9.5% (5.6 standard drinks) Pairing: Vietnamese, nostalgia, solemn undertaking to never again start drinking at 4pm Verdict: ★★★½ “I’ve definitely had more disgusting drinks than this. But I’ve also had much better drinks than this.” The night started with such promise. Over bad roti and good Vietnamese at Capital Market (the food […]

May 24, 2015

Cost: $8 Alcohol Volume: 7% Pairing: Shame pizza ($2.99 a slice from New World fyi) Verdict: ★★★★ “God, why do I even drink wine?” Hello dear readers. Before we start, we’d like everyone to turn on “Graduation (Friends Forever)” by Vitamin C as an accompaniment to the review. We’ll wait here. For this week, we decided […]

May 17, 2015

Cost: $5 a glass Alcohol Volume: Look, it’s complicated. Pairing: Unrelenting rage, tequila. Verdict: ★★★★ “This wine is getting better as it is being imbued with Jesus’ support for me.” Loyal readers, we’re scraping the bottom of the barrel. This week, we’re reviewing a wine we bought at a bar several weeks ago. While indulging in […]

May 11, 2015

Cost: $6 Alcohol Volume: 13.5% (1.5 standard drinks) Pairing: Weird chips, chicken sandwich with too much aioli, too much cider Verdict: ½ “It’s like it went down the wrong hole but it didn’t.” With perhaps the most visceral response any of our alcohols have ever received, we’re just not sure we drank Sake right. We bought a […]

May 3, 2015

Cost: $8 Alcohol Volume: 13% (7.7 standard drinks) Pairing: Roti Chenai, a Grindr obsession, regret. Verdict: ★★½ “It wasn’t the worst thing I have ever had in my mouth.” While Lydia suns it up on Waiheke Island (it’s raining so we get the last laugh), I, with the help of a few friends after a messy […]

April 27, 2015

Cost: $4 Alcohol Volume: 12.5% (7.4 standard drinks) Pairing: Pizza and misery Verdict: ★★★★ “I’ve probably drunk worse” We need to talk about Australia. Emotions about the big sandy bastard include: “Why is everyone moving there?” “Should I move there?” and “Is Tinder in Melbourne really that great?” However, we’re in the business of only asking […]

April 19, 2015

Cost: $10 (750ml) Alcohol volume: 12 per cent (7.1 standards) Pairing: Apple martinis, a BBQ Bacon Rodeo Burger, debilitating heartburn. At long last, tonight was the night. Loyal readers will long remember the ever-present tensions that exist between the reviewers about one of New Zealand’s finest exports, Lindauer. Less of a review and more of […]

March 29, 2015

Cost: $10 per wee bottle thing Alcohol Volume: A lot, probably Pairing: Bloody top notch dinner at Grill Meats Beer, Taylor Swift Verdict: ★★★★★ “Mitch will literally never let me rate anything this high again so I’m carpe diem-ing.” A solo Lydia review this week as Mitch is away in Melbourne probably having a better […]

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