Q: Flat with friends, or flat with strangers?
Whio says: | Toroa says: |
Listen, it is easier to go on Vic Deals and find a pre established flat. You won’t have to worry about buying furniture, getting a toaster, or putting your name on the internet and power-bill, because who the fuck wants to do that? As someone who has flatted with both strangers and friends, I can honestly say that there’s pro’s and con’s to both. And it’s situational. However, flatting with strangers is, the majority of the time, not as scary as you think it will be. In fact, those “strangers” will be looking for the exact same thing you are: a nice flatmate who does the dishes. Speaking of, it’s easier to set boundaries with people when you’re not worried about dirty dishes ruining your friendship. You can passive aggressively text the flat chat telling people to clean up after themselves, and if they take it personally you don’t have to hang out with them socially. Likewise, flat not working out? It’s much easier to “break up” with strangers than it is your friend who you’ve been dreaming of living with since the halls, only to find out that they are, in fact, a slob that pays the power bill late. In fact, you’ve just moved out of the halls? Some rooms will even come pre-furnished. No need to spend $500 on TSB living to kit out your mouldy room if you can find a pre-furnished spot, already made up for you. Another big win. Right now, there’s more rooms available than people looking for rooms in Wellington, so the flatting market is your oyster. In a buyers market you’ll likely be able to shop around a little bit, find a nice group of people looking to fill a room, and get the best deal. No getting stuck with the windowless room in Brooklyn because you drew straws with your mates. | Getting your first flat will always be a terrifying ordeal. What is a bond? How do you set up power and Wi-Fi?? Do you need to buy a couch???? Where do you buy a couch that isn’t covered in suspicious stains???? Something that may make it easier is choosing a flatting group made up of your friends. If you choose to live with a group of people you already know, there are perks like already knowing whether or not you get along, already knowing what foods they like or what they’re allergic to, and if you were in halls with them, you’ll probably know what they’re like to live with, too. I’ve found through living with friends that having hangout time as a flat has been easier, too, because you don’t have to build new connections with new people. If you’re queer, you don’t have to worry about whether someone is an ally. For a first flat, it can be reassuring to have familiar, trusted faces around when you’re freaking out about heating and mould and your oven breaking. I will say, unless you’re the kind of friends that can and do have conversations about boundaries, it can get a little awkward or difficult to navigate situations where someone might’ve pissed you off, (like seriously guys, it’s not my turn to do the dishes,) but if you’re able to get through those conflicts, your friendship will often get stronger. Moving in with your friends can provide comfort and trust in a time where you might need it most. I’ve lived with strangers only once, and it didn’t end well: I wasn’t comfortable around them the whole time I lived with them because we’d never really clicked. Living with my friends, though, has made life so much easier: our conflicts have resulted in our relationships being better, I’ve never had to stress on my own about buying stuff for a flat, and if I needed clothes for town, I knew I could always raid someone else’s wardrobe. |